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How Overgiving Affects You, Your Work, Business, & Relationships

Editor's Note: "During the last session of our Executive Women’s Leadership Program Mastermind, members talked about giving up perfection in their homes, especially at holiday time. The November-December holiday time, is particularly stressing for working Mothers, who try to be all for everyone - at work, at home and in their communities. Check out the following thought piece by Jenni Glad, a guest speaker at the Fall ‘22 Executive Women’s Leadership program, in which she shares her experiences and her advice"--Leslie Grossman

For a long time, I focused on healing, self-worth and self-love to change the habits of doing too much at once, over-extending and exhausting myself with work. Automatically taking responsibility for the household, childcare and other chores without asking for help and without taking a step back and reflecting on all I have accomplished. I felt less than, underappreciated and under-valued, and resentful.

Even before I became a mother, I could work an entire day and always feel I didn't have enough time to practice self-care and the basics of just attempting to eat well, exercise enough or just do nothing but rest. I was always on the go and rushed through everything.

But it felt wrong because I didn't listen to myself and kept giving too much. 

I thought the key to healing and bringing balance was about self-worth only. I did all kinds of programs, mindset coaching, business coaching and healing, but it didn't change the results I was getting. I always felt I didn't get back as much as I gave; I felt somehow insufficient.

I then realized I could focus on that forever. It wouldn’t change the unhealthy habits, patterns, lack of boundaries or the way I was giving = from a place of expectation rather than unconditionally and deservingness.

So I learned it was a problem with receiving that would complete the self-worth part and help me to hold my boundaries. That brought me the balance, well-being and awareness I needed. It helped me to step into my power, lead myself better and get the balance I had sought and craved for so long.

Overgivers often believe love, money, happiness and success must be earned and worked hard for and that their inner beliefs and emotional patterns drive their behavior.

I am excited and passionate about bringing awareness around this topic because it affects way too many people in their daily lives!

The patterns of overgiving are causing exhaustion, burnout, emotional and adrenaline imbalance, restlessness, loneliness and deep feelings of insecurity. 

They always somehow believe they don't deserve or know how to receive their highest good but rather feel stuck or trapped in their current situation.

How overgiving affects your work, business, relationships, and finances:

YOU:

  • You keep doing things even when you are exhausted.

  • You don't do what your inner voice is saying.

  • Self-care, well-being, and resting are often last on your list.

  • You struggle with time and self-management.

  • Perfectionism and impostor control you.

  • You often feel rejected and unappreciated.

AT WORK:

  • You say yes to new projects when you should say no

  • You don't ask for help but overwork

  • There's no time for coffee breaks or proper lunches

  • You are underpaid and don’t ask for raise

  • You micromanage

YOUR BUSINESS:

  • You give your time away for free

  • You discount your fees

  • You believe results and success will only come if you do more, work hard

  • You don’t trust your team 

YOUR RELATIONSHIPS:

  • You are always there to support others

  • You take care of others' to-dos’ & their emotions and wellbeing

  • You don't express your needs or expectations openly and are dissatisfied

  • You feel you need to give back when you receive good gifts or compliments

  • You believe your relationships are your responsibility

  • People in your life begin to expect you to do everything for them and it is rarely reciprocated

Does any of this resonate with you?

When it's unconscious, and until it's healed, it feels like some invisible forces direct our behavior in a way that we don't recognize in ourselves. 

Many feel inadequate and that there must be something wrong with them. Simply put, the answer is nothing!⁠ The learned patterns and behaviors rule us unconsciously until we see the light.

Only when you heal and unlearn the subconscious beliefs and patterns, then consciously implement change in your behaviors, will you learn to receive. Only after setting up boundaries will you naturally feel confident and can your own your brilliance, power and potential be truly unleashed. ⁠

Healing and learning to receive your self-worth enhances your life, relationships, work, business, finances and well-being. 

Receiving your worth, love, appreciation and abundance limitlessly requires space, ease, intentions, and alignment with your values. It takes effortless action-taking, healthy self-appreciation and respect.


The Center of Excellence in Public Leadership at George Washington University (GW CEPL)  offers programs for women at every level of their leadership journey to help address the early socialized habits, as well as the workplace and life challenges that often hold women back from pursuing increased responsibility, while supporting their growth and development.

Live online programs are known for their interactive discussions and networking among the participants, as well as its critical, career-changing content.

Click here to learn more: Women Leaders on the Rise Program (#WRISE)  gives high-potential women leaders at the start of their careers the tools to enable management success, while addressing limiting beliefs that may be holding them back. Executive Women’s Leadership Program (#EWLP)  is designed for experienced executives who have potential for greater leadership responsibilities. Topics covered include executive presence, negotiations, resilience, growth mindset and more!

Global Women’s Leadership Program (#GWLP) provides game-changing leadership strategies that will transform your mindset and expand your sphere of influence as a woman leader. Program is designed for global executives.